Friday, August 7, 2009

Marriage and Bug Bites.

We had a glass cabin rented out in the middle of the woods that was built into a boulder for our honeymoon. We finally get there and the water pump has gone out. The owner wanted us to "rough it" for $150 a night! I don't think so. So BabyDaddy...I will now change him to Husby... helps the owner repair it. It takes a couple of hours and I fall asleep on the couch. We did enjoy our fabulous night there, though. There was a family of raccoons that would knock on the door and you'd leave food (I think it was dog food...or maybe cat food. I don't remember) out for them to eat. When they were done, they'd stare at you through the glass. It was funny.

The next morning we packed up and left, as we weren't willing to stay an entire weekend with an iffy water situation. We just went to a hotel and went shopping in the area. It was a nice, low-key honeymoon. We were official and no longer had to "hide." I know that people who read this will think I'm the evil "other woman" who stole someone's boyfriend, but it wasn't like that at all.

My family was thrilled. I guess I left out the part where my dad was not happy about me dating someone with a kid and who lived with his ex-girlfriend. But Husby lived up to all promises of moving out, getting his own place, etc. Husby took my dad to lunch to ask permission to marry me (before we got engaged, of course) and my dad was teary-eyed and said he couldn't think of a more honorable man to marry his daughter. As they got to know each other, they realized they had a LOT in common. :)

So... I'm a bad storyteller, I know. I jump around and babble and skip over this and that, etc. Sorry. That's how my mind works too. :)

The first weekend we were to get kiddo -- I need to come up with a nickname for him -- Husby decided to tell The Beast (aka BabyMama) he was married. We met at a department store but I stayed in another area so she wouldn't see me. Husby said that The Beast and Evil Witch (Baby Mama's mother) were sitting in The Beast's car and Husby held up his newly married ring fingered hand and said, "Just thought I'd let you know I got married." Jaws hit the floor. Silence. Husby savors this, but shows no emotion. Beast says, "To Constance*?" She's obviously thinking WOW. He married the next girl he dated after me?? He says, "Yes. We've been together over a year." Technically, a year and 9 months but he didn't want to go into too much detail with her. They didn't have much, if anything, to say. Husby said the look on their faces was priceless.

Kiddo has never known life without me. We have always made sure he calls me Constance* and not "mommy" because he has a mother. I never spoke to The Beast and she could only hate me from afar. :) I have loved Kiddo like he was my own child and took him to the doctor when he was sick, bought him clothes and toys, set my alarm to get up in the middle of the night to check his temp when he had fever, got up with him when he cried, and played with him every moment he was at our apartment. He loved me and I loved him. But I always knew I was never his mother. When out in public, people thought we were mommy and son. I'd correct people when they'd call me his "mommy" because I didn't want to confuse Kiddo and I didn't want someone to know who Kiddo was and report back to The Beast that I was trying to make people think I was his mother.

When I married Husby, I was getting an awesome package deal: Husby and Kiddo. Dealing with The Beast would be part of it, I knew, but she truly lives up to her name, even to this day.

I'll tell a quick story to explain what I mean.

She decided to enroll Kiddo in a rundown daycare. We had no say over this. And she decided that I was not allowed to pick Kiddo up from daycare on our days with him (Tuesday and every other weekend). Why? Because she said so. Okay, fine. Husby had to drive to meet me at daycare, sign Kiddo out, and put him in my car. Husby was going to school at night to work on his degree and I was to take care of Kiddo for the first hour or so until Husby got home from class. One day we got kiddo and he was COVERED in bug bites. Covered to the point that daycare even said something to us. Husby said, "He's been at his mother's house. I will try to clear up what I can, but I'll talk to her about it." This was on a Tuesday. I remember this because that Friday, daycare said his legs were swollen and we took him to the doctor. He had accumulated even more bug bites on his little legs and his dirty little kid fingers were scratching them until they bled and were now infected. The doctor couldn't believe what he saw and prescribed antibiotics. Think that would be enough to get The Beast's attention? Ha. No. We went through this TWO.MORE.TIMES. I understand some kids get bites, but he had over 100 bites on him each time. If you take your kid outside during bug season, and your kid tastes good to bugs, PUT BUG REPELLANT ON THEM! Good lord. I even sent a can of it home with him once. Didn't matter. She never used it.

Another time when he was in pre-k at another rundown location, the school nurse sent him home because he (the nurse) thought Kiddo had chicken pox. I called the school nurse and turns out, I knew him! How embarassing! But I told him our situation and he understood. He said he just had to protect all the other kids at the pre-k, so he needed a doctor's note clearing Kiddo to return. Kiddo had been at The Beast's house all weekend and it was our day (Tuesday) so I left work, picked him up, and brought him back to work with me. I worked in a family practice clinic so I had the same doc who saw him before look at Kiddo and got a note saying it was bug bites and not chicken pox.

This was infuriating, so I went to her house and told her that we would like to keep Kiddo with us at our house (we had bought a house by then) for a week to let the bites clear up. We offered to pay to have her house professionally sprayed and she turned us down, saying she'd just bomb her house. (He had mosquito and flea bites everywhere, even in areas that he shouldn't, if you get my meaning.) So the week at our house, his bites heal and he has a great time. He bawled when she picked him up. He wanted to stay. So he was at her house ONE NIGHT and he is covered again. The nurse had called me back to report this to me. I called The Beast and said we'd like to keep him until she gets her flea problem under control. She said, "No. I will keep him. I'd rather him get more bites now and know the problem isn't fixed than let him get all cleared up and go through this again." WHAT.THE.HELL.???????? Seriously?! So I had no other choice but to leave him there crying with her. :( And he did get a LOT more bites.

Next up: Restraining order. Child abuse allegations (against US). Court.

*my real name is not Constance.


MyHaloSlips said...

Holy crap! That is horrible! Did you guys call child abuse? Or the school? I so would have. LOL! What a Bitch!

Christy said...

AHHHHHH! She sounds like a nightmare. I am intrigued to hear about the child abuse allegations.